When people hear about chastity belts, they imagine massive metal belts from the Middle Ages. Fathers or partners have forced their daughters and wives to wear these devices to control their sexuality and prevent them from any pleasure or sexual activity.
Today, there are many theories that chastity belts are just a myth, and that the belts we see in museums were created later in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries as a mockery of medieval people.
But chastity devices exist in the modern age and are often used for BDSM sessions. These devices, including chastity belts, are a popular BDSM sex toy for chastity play and dominant and submissive play. Many use it to dominate their partners and control and deny their orgasms.
What is chastity play?
Chastity play is a type of kinky play, often used in BDSM sessions, where the submissive partner abstains from sexual contact and orgasms.
Usually, a dominant partner, lover, or professional like Dominatrix dictates the time period of their endurance from sexual relief.
Submissive partners may wear chastity devices such as belts or cages that lock their penis and prevent them from enjoying sexual activities.
The dominant person in the relationship is often the key holder - they take the key from the device and store it to control the submissive partner.
Why do folks like chastity play?
There are many reasons why people love chastity play:
BDSM lovers often use it for dominance and submissive play. The dominant partner control and dominant their sub who can't engage in sexual activities or please themselves until they allow it.
It is a perfect way to enhance dominance. Submissive partners will beg and ask for permission to release them, and dominant partners will enjoy the power rush and pleading.
Wearing a chastity device under clothing can be extremely stimulating for the wearer. During daily tasks, the device can remind you of your submissive role and connect you with the dominant partner.
This kinky play can increase your sexual pleasure and orgasms. When you are not allowed to touch yourself, you build tensions and expectations. When you can finally come after denial, your climax will be intense and stronger than usual.
You can improve your sex life by using a locking device and removing your penis from sexual activities. When you are unable to perform typical penile-vaginal penetration, you will discover new ways to pleasure and satisfaction.
Once you remove the penis from the picture, you can also focus on other erogenous zones. You may feel more sensitive and arouse areas you haven’t paid much attention to before. You will be able to discover your body without focusing on the genitals.
Chastity play and devices are the perfect way to practice orgasm denial and boost endurance. You can stimulate your submissive partner for a long time, without the possibility of relief.
Establishing boundaries and safewords
If you want to experiment with chastity play that belongs in the world of BDSM, you need to talk with your lover first. You must discuss your limits and establish the boundaries.
This is an opportunity to express what you don’t want to do during the play. These can be body parts, intensity or time period of the play, or other things you or your partner don’t like.
You both need to respect the consent given for certain activities and never cross set boundaries during the play! A BDSM session is not an opportunity to force your partner into things they don’t want.
Choose a safe word that can help the submissive partner finish the chastity play if they feel insecure.
Safewords can be simple words that are not related to sex, such as blueberries or ice cream. Both partners must agree that the act must be done when this word is used. This will give you a sense of trust and security, and it is your way out if things get too intense.
Chastity play tips
Play with a submissive partner and remind them of the chastity device they don't expect it. "I know you want to orgasm." "Does your dick feel good inside?" "Do you want me to unlock the device?" A small reminder that they will feel worse and hornier.
Tease them with your clothes
When you are home, put on a sexy outfit, nice lingerie, or walk around naked. Do your daily tasks and pretend not to notice how they drool around the house while watching you.
Release them to play with them
Unlock the chastity device and tell your lover that they can masturbate and orgasm in front of you. When they will get close and ask for permission to come, don't allow it. Repeat this several times and then place the chastity device back on. This will drive them crazy.
Masturbate in front of them
Start playing with yourself while your submissive partner watches you. Ask if they want to remove the device and join you and then ignore their answers. You can also play without a toy, but your sub can't touch themselves. If they don't listen and start playing with their penis, then punish them.
Destroy their orgasm
Tell your partner you will reward them and stimulate them to orgasm. When they start cumming, let go and destroy their orgasm. They will ejaculate but will remain unsatisfied and frustrated.
Please their erogenous zones
You can reward your partner by satisfying and stimulating their non-genital erogenous zones, such as neck, back, nipples, and legs. Tease them with your tongue, hands, teeth, or sex toys like wand or vibrator. If they don't wear the chastity device during the play, ignore their erection completely.
Play the waiting game
Tell your submissive partner in the morning that they will get the prize at night. You can say that you will remove the chastity device or give them an oral or hand job. When the time comes for a reward, pretend that you didn't say anything. If they ask any questions, tell them that they will be punished if they lie. You can repeat it the next day to tease them.
What is a chastity belt?
The chastity belt goes around the wearer's hips like a normal belt and covers their genitals. It is often made of plastic, metal, and leather and is available in various models for vulva and penis owners.
It comes with a lock, so the wearer can't touch their private parts, and with a key intended for the dominant partner so they can control their submissive partner.
Chastity belts for people with penises often have a butt plug or dildo attached to the belt to stimulate and torture a submissive partner when wearing it.
What is a chastity cage?
A chastity cage usually consists of three components - a cage that fits the penis, a ring that goes around the testicles, and a lock that holds both parts together.
Cages can be made of different materials such as stainless steel, metal, silicone, or plastic. It should be placed on a flaccid penis and will prevent the wearer from getting an erection and touching the genitals.
Other chastity toys and devices.
If you are thinking of experimenting with chastity play, you can select other toys and enjoy the intense submission:
- App-controlled chastity devices allow you to control and lock your submissive lover over short and long distances with your mobile phone.
- Chastity cage belts are the perfect mix of belts and cages and are often available with anal plugs that will torture the sub while wearing the toy.
- Chastity corset is a corset designed for the penis and it's an ideal toy for beginners who want to start slowly. The wearer places it on the penis and tightens it with an elastic band.
- Chastity bondage shorts are a great outfit for penis owners who want to take the chastity play to the next level and wear secured shorts.
- The anal chastity plug should be inserted and locked like a light bulb into the user’s anus. Once inserted, you can pull the pin, and the toy will open inside like flower petals, which is great for anal training.
- Cock rings with a leash are a classic toy for bondage and discipline. The leash attached to the cock ring gives you endless opportunities to train and discipline your submissive partner.
How to put on a chastity cage?
Before putting on a new device, we recommend to trim pubic hair so that it doesn't get caught in the cage. Shaving the hair may not be a good idea because of skin irritation and itching. The cage can irritate genital area and make the whole experience more annoying than exciting.
Rule number one for placing a chastity cage is to do it on a flaccid penis. As with other sex toys, use a natural lubricant and apply it to the penis and testicles and follow these steps:
Slide on the ring
Slowly and gently push the ring over the penis and testicles. Moving the scrotum skin through the ring first will help place the hoop correctly behind testicles. Using a lubricant will help slide the ring on smoothly.
Attach the cage
Carefully place the cage on the flaccid penis. Most chastity cages have locking pins that need to be attached to the base ring and will help you push the cage in the right place. Align the holes on the ring and the cage pins and secure the cage against the ring until it is in place.
Lock the device
To lock the device, insert the key lock through the aligned cage and ring, and turn the key. Experiment with the device lock before you put it on to avoid complications later.
If you struggle with putting on the chastity cage
You can try the stocking technique. Use the smooth and silky stocking and thread it through the end and opening of the cage.
First, set the ring on and then place the penis inside the stocking. Bring the cage to the base ring, moving the penis to the entrance. When you pull the stocking, the penis will be placed in the cage. Lock the device and pull the stocking from the cage.
If this method doesn't work for you, you can try to change stocking with plastic foil. Repeat the same steps as you would do with the stocking method.
Be patient and experiment with different techniques until you find the one that suits you.
Chastity cages to check out
Before you dive into the world of chastity, here are some chastity cages we can offer you.
On the other hand, here's a product we always loved - a cock ring with a leash. This one can be used for some really interesting and out-of-the-box role play sessions.
Chastity play is a great way to train a submissive partner and enhance the dominant position. It can be used as foreplay, for teasing and edging, or to punish and discipline the bottom lover.
You can practice it with the chastity toys like cages and belts or enjoy it without a device. If you want to try this kinky activity, talk to your partner, establish boundaries and experiment safely!
Chastity devices aren’t just for maidens in bodice ripping novels. They are for today’s penises too!
There is a lot to unpack when it comes to understanding the why’s and how’s of chastity. It is not as simple as putting on a cock cage and forgetting about it. Luckily, we have the information you are looking for!
What is Male Chastity
Male- or more precise, people with penises – chastity, is when someone uses a penile chastity device to prevent the person wearing it from getting an erection. There are a variety of penis chastity cages, ranging from a simple lock-and-key cage to more elaborate ones using a Prince Albert piercing or deterrent “spikes” to prevent a person from getting an erection.
These devices can be worn for a short duration (e.g., going to a party) to a long-term arrangement lasting days, weeks, and even months! Chastity devices may be worn as part of a dynamic with a partner or used for solo play.
This is probably the most common question about chastity devices. Most people who have not explored chastity have a difficult time understanding the appeal.
The reasons people choose to use a chastity device is manifold. Some people report they enjoy being denied self-pleasure, orgasms, and erections by a partner. Allowing their partner to control the timing of their erections and orgasms as a form of submission can make a person feel safe, loved, and owned.
Other people report that when their penis is removed from the equation during sex it forces them to become more connected and creative during sex. Several blog entries and interviews with men (self-identified as cis, heterosexual), reported that when their penis was in a cock cage, they became more aware of sensations like gentle touching of their skin and the feeling of a partner kissing their neck or ears. They also reported that when they were unable to use their penis for penetration, they became more creative lovers.
Some people also enjoy the reversal of gender roles. In most of Western society, men are supposed to be the people who initiate sex. By consenting to being locked in a cock cage, they release that role and put their partner in control of when and how they want to have sex.
First and foremost, the cage must fit properly! If your device is too loose, it can rub and slip causing discomfort and pain and possible chafing. If your cock cage is too tight, it can restrict blood flow and cause nerve damage. Over time, the consistent use of a cage that is too small may lead to erectile dysfunction.
Second, always make sure you have a spare key! While the idea of allowing a partner to hold onto the only key to your cage may be sexy, it is also dangerous. There will be emergency situations which can arise, and you will need the key. If asking permission before unlocking yourself is part of your dynamic, make sure to negotiate how to handle emergency situations (retroactive permission, permission to remove in emergencies without first asking your dominant).
Third, cleanliness is important. While most cage devices have an option to pee while keeping it locked, you will still sweat, and pee will dribble. You will need to remove the cage for regular cleaning if you opt to wear it long term. While there is no universal rule for how often your cage should be removed, most recommendations range from every four to seven days.
Forth, negotiate how often you will be allowed to get an erection and orgasm. Most long-term chastity device users recommend a weekly orgasm. A significant percentage of long-term chastity device users mention that they are allowed to orgasm when their devices are removed for cleaning. This may be in the presence of their dominant or alone, depending on what was negotiated. A regular chance to get an erection and orgasm is also an important check to make sure that you are not developing erectile issues from long-term use of the cock cage.
Measuring for Fit
Proper measurement for a cock cage is important for safety and comfort. Do not get a cage which is too large. This will result in rubbing and discomfort. It will also make urinating while wearing the cage messy. If the cage is too small, especially if the back ring is too small, you can restrict blood flow and cause nerve damage.
[Insert diagram of cock cage with parts labeled here]
The standard cock cage consists of four basic parts: the back ring, the locking device, the gap, and the cage itself. You will need to measure for the back ring, the cage length, and the gap. To measure properly you will need a thick piece of string, at least 12 inches long. Do not use a flexible tape measure as it will not lie properly for the measurement. You will also need a marker and a ruler.
All measurements should be taken while completely flaccid! While measuring yourself for a cock cage can be exciting, you need to push this out of your brain. If you are semi-erect, you will mess up the measurements. You should also take your measurements three times during the day: morning, afternoon, and evening. The average of these three measurements will provide the most accurate fit.
Measuring for the Back Ring
The back ring will fit over your scrotum and the base of your penis. To measure this area, using your string, wrap the string around the back of your scrotum and your penis. Tie a knot in the string. Tug on the string lightly to make sure there is no slipping. You should be able to just barely slip a finger between your body and the string without it cutting off circulation. Wear this string tied onto you for about 15 minutes and go about your day. If there is any slipping, tighten the knot just slightly and continue to wear. If it feels tight or uncomfortable loosen the knot slightly and continue to wear. Mark this location and then remove the string. Measure the length of string used. Repeat these two more times at different times of the day and then average the three measurements.
For example, if you measured 41 cm in the morning, 43.25 cm in the afternoon. And 42.75 cm in the evening, this would be the calculation:
41 + 43.25 + 42.75 /3 =42.33 for your average measurement.
You would then want to try a back ring measuring 42 and one measuring 43 cm to see which is the better fit.
Measuring the Length
The first, and most important thing for this measuring is to NOT LIE. Yes, exaggerating the length of a penis is an international pastime of people who have them! However, you are measuring yourself to get an accurate measurement for this toy and for your safety. If the cage is too long, you will have problems urinating and possibly with rubbing during the day.
While completely flaccid, stand upright. Place your measuring string against the base of your penis. Measure along the top of your penis down to the tip. Mark this location. Using a measuring tape, get the length. Many people suggest subtracting 6mm or ¼ inch from this measurement to make sure the cage fits snuggly but not too tight.
Measuring the Cage Width
The last formal measurement will be for the cage width. Find the widest part of your penis while it is completely flaccid. For most people this is in the middle of the shaft. Wrap a thick string around the shaft and mark the location. Repeat this measurement two other times during the day. Then average these measurements (as calculated above) to find your width for the cage or tube.
Estimating the Gap
Unless you are ordering a custom cage, you will not need an exact measurement for the gap. Most cock cages come with a small, medium, and large gap option. If your testicles are close to your body and there is not a lot of skin to allow them to hang, you will need a larger gap. The lower your testicles hang from your body, the smaller the gap you will need. Be aware that over time, if you use the cage for extended periods, you may need to get one with a smaller gap as your body will adjust to the cage.
How to Put on a Cock Cage
For a standard cock cage, the process of putting it on can be broken into three steps: get the back ring positioned, put your penis into the cage or tube, and lock it.
Step 1: Back Ring
If you have a solid back ring (like this model) you start by sliding the ring up your shaft. Then, one at a time, push your testicles through the loop. This can be likened to getting squirrels into a sack. It will take some time and practice, so be patient and go slow!
If you have a cage with a hinged back ring, open the hinge, position this behind your scrotum and penis, and close the hinge. If you find the hinge rubs or is uncomfortable, you may want to wrap a piece of tape or a bandage around it to keep it from pulling hairs and skin.
Step 2. The Cage
To load your penis into the cage or sleeve, the easiest way is to “turtle” your penis (push the head and shaft up into themselves, like scrunching up a sock before you put it on) and allow your penis to slide into the cage.
Step 3. Locking
The final step is to lock your cage. For people who enjoy the visual stimulation of a padlock, there are many great options. With these cages, you put the padlock on and lock it with a key. Others will have a slide lock or a combination lock. For these, you slide the keyed side into the lock and turn the tumblers.
If you have a Prince Albert cage, the final step will be to place the supplied ring through your piercing and into the cage lock.
If you have purchased a model with a sounding device (like this one) the final step will be to slide in the sound. Remember to use lube!
Buying a Cage
If this is your first cock cage purchase, you will want to buy an off-the-shelf model rather than pay the price of a custom cage. Make sure chastity devices are for you before dropping a lot of money on your one-of-a-kind toy! Get your measurements ready and then go shopping.
There are several decisions to make when purchasing a toy: materials, style, locking options, color.
When it comes to picking a chastity cage, you will want to make sure it is made of body-safe materials. Metal cages will be body safe (unless you have a rare metal allergy). They are also durable and shiny! Additionally, metal cages have a heft that silicone and plastic cages do not. For a person who wants to be reminded they are wearing a cage, metal is a great choice.
Body-safe silicone and ABS plastic are other common options for chastity cages. Body-safe silicone and ABS plastic are both safe options for a cage. Silicone options may be a bit more flexible or comfortable to wear for some users. ABS plastic cages are often the lowest profile (making them easy to wear discretely under clothing) and come in the widest color options. The biggest drawback with ABS options is that they wear out or break much more quickly than will a metal or silicone option. They are also a bit harder to sterilize.
When it comes to style and color, these will be personal preferences. Spend some time looking at different options to find the ones which appeal to you!