Articles and advice about orgasms generally focus on the genitals. After all, most sex education focuses on procreation, so we concentrate on the body parts necessary for making pregnancy happen.
This means most of us do not get much education about involving other body parts which can stimulate the pleasure centers.
Since the release of the film Free the Nipple in 2014, people have become more aware of nipplegams, even if they don’t fully understand it.
Nipple orgasms, or nipplegasms, are orgasms which occur from the stimulation of the nipples, breasts, and areolas. Nipplegasms happen in people of all genders, though much of the research has focused on cis-women.
There is a good reason nipples on people of all genders cause orgasms. When the nipples are stimulated, it triggers the same part of the brain that is activated when the genitals are stimulated: the genital sensory cortex.
Dr. Nan Wise conducted a study looking at the brain of women in an fMRI (machine which tracts what part of the brain is activated during different activities) while their nipples were stimulated.
When the nipples send information that they are being touched and excited to the brain, this triggers the genital sensory cortex.
The cortex tells the brain (specifically the hypothalamus) to release oxytocin, the feel-good neurotransmitter which causes the spasmodic contractions for orgasm.
This is all a scientific way to say you play with your nipples (or someone else’s nipples) your brain will give you (or them) an orgasm.
What does a Nipple orgasm or Nipplegasm feel like?
Nipplegasms feel different for different people. They can also feel different in the same person over time.
People describe them ranging from a gentle release resembling a full-body sigh, to toe-curling, genital pulsing climaxes.
What happens to your nipples when stimulated?
For people of all genders, when the nipples are stimulated in a pleasing way, the erectile tissue in the nipples will become erect.
The breast tissue in all genders can also increase in blood flow and the breasts can swell as much as 25 percent.
How do you cause a nipplegasm?
It takes time and practice to learn how to give yourself or someone else a nipplegasm. A few quick pinches or licks is not going to do the trick.
So..How to play with nipples?
Get into your body
Nipplegasms are more likely to happen when you are centered in your body. Begin a sexy session with some focused breathing. Slowly inhale for a count of six. Pause your breath for a count of two. Then fully exhale for a count of eight. Repeat this for a minute or two before diving into sex play.
You can breathe alone or with a partner. Breathing with a partner as the start of your sexy time will help center both of you. It can also help make you both feel more grounded and present.
People in this state report that they feel more connected with one another and have better sex.
Start by touching your belly. Gently stroke it with your fingertips, a feather, or a body tickler.
Pay attention to how your body feels and spend time enjoying the sensation.
Work up to the under-breast area and between your breasts.
Continue to gently touch and stroke your breasts with your fingers. The breasts are not equally enervated. The lower outside quadrant of the breast has the largest number of nerves. Transition from stroking to squeezing and gentle scratching to wake up the nerves.
Your nipples should start to become erect at this point.
Finally, start paying attention to your nipples. Try different types of stimulation.
Gentle stroking across the nipple, running a fingertip around the areola and rim of the nipple, squeeze it, and flick it. Pay attention to how your body responds.
Add heat or ice
Temperature differences can help increase the pleasurable feelings in your breasts and nipples. Run an ice cube over your breasts and nipples. Let the cold water drip onto your nipple.
Place an ice cube in your mouth and suck on a partner’s nipple. All of these activities will increase the pleasure you feel with breast stimulation.
You may prefer warm sensations. Wax play candles can be a great option. Candles burn at different temperatures.
You want a 100 percent paraffin candle (like many of the religious pillar candles). Avoid scented candles, long tapers, and birthday candles as those burn above 140 degrees and can cause a first-degree burn.
Light a candle and let the wax melt a little bit. Drip the wax onto your breasts or your partner’s breasts and nipples.
This will provide a warm sensation. When the wax dries, you can peel it off with your fingers or use a small pocketknife to gently shave it off.
Obviously, use caution if using a knife for removal.
Another fun way to play is adding the stimulating sex lubricant onto the nipple. The cooling and/or the warming sensation will definitely excite your partner.
Add nipple clamps
Nipple clamps provide a pinching sensation. They are a great option if you want to have continual pressure on a nipple. Nipple clamps sometimes come with small weights which will add a pulling sensation to the clamps.
When selecting nipple clamps you want to consider the nipple size, the amount of pressure exerted by the clamp, and the look.
Nipple clamps come in several options: tweezer style, gator-style, crossbar, and pervertable.
Tweezer-style clamps are the most popular design style. These clamps are composed of two arms joined at the base on one side, like tweezers you may have in the bathroom. There is a small ring you can slide up and down the arms to increase and decrease the tension on the nipple.
Tweezer-styles also come with lots of pretty attachments to add some elegance or whimsy to your kinky play.
Bijoux makes an entire line of beautiful tweezer style clamps.
Gator-style clamps are composed to two arms joined by an adjustable bar in the middle. The bar can be set to keep the clamp open to a certain width.
This is a great option for people who want less pressure on their nipples or don’t enjoy having their nipples fully compressed.
Check out these from Sex Kitten for a practical and pretty option.
Crossbar style clamps look like a hashtag. The nipple fits in the middle and the bars are adjusted to increase or decrease tension.
These clamps offer the largest opening for nipples and are a great choice if you or a partner has particularly large nips.
Pervertables are daily items that are used for sexual reasons. Wood clothespins are the most common pervertable for nipple clamps. The clothespin provides an intense crushing sensation, which can be pleasurable once you are very aroused.
Other things like chip bag clips, two chopsticks with rubber bands around each end, and other items are common.
For more information about choosing the perfect nipple clamps for you, check out Which Nipple Clamps Are Right For You from LoveLettersToAUnicorn.com.
Nipple clamp safety
Whenever you use nipple clamps you will be reducing or eliminating the blood flow to the nipple.
You need to make sure not to leave clamps on too long. While there is no consensus of the maximum time clamps may be safely used, removing them after no longer than 10 minutes is generally considered to be safe.
Additionally, when the blood flow to the nipple has been restricted for more than a few minutes, the sensation of the blood refilling the nipple may be intense.
Some people can find this sensation quite painful.
Additionally, pay attention to your body or ask your partner for feedback. Make sure the sensation is pleasurable and wanted and not too painful.
If the pain is too great, you won’t be able to achieve nipplegasm and it may derail your whole play session.
Read how to use nipple clamps to learn how to use them properly, alone and with a partner.
Add suction
Many people find sucking on nipples very pleasurable. You can do this with your mouth or with nipple suckers and nipple pumps.
Here are some techniques and how-to’s for the best nipple suction.
If you are going to use your mouth to stimulate a partner’s nipples, start tentatively. Gently flick their nipple with your tongue. You may want to run your tongue slowly across the nipple or circle the nipple gently.
Use your lips. Purse your lips like you are puckering for a kiss around their nipple and gently kiss and release it. Alternate this with licking the nipple for increased stimulation.
You may then want to try taking a bit of the areola and nipple into your mouth and sucking gently.
Bite it. Some people enjoy the sensation of being bitten. If your partner is open to this, start by taking their erect nipple gently between your front teeth and apply a small bit of pressure.
Let your partner’s response guide how much pressure and how long you bite them.
Alternating sucking, licking, and biting techniques can drive your partner into a pleasure frenzy and cause a nipplegasm.
If you are not a fan of sucking on a partner’s nipples, you can use various electronic nipple suckers to help stimulate a person.
Nonmechanical options of nipple suckers exist. These are simple tools which squeeze and pull on the nipple. They also look cute!
Try the 9s Silicone Nip Pulls for creating a pulling and sucking sensation for you or a partner.
Pumps are small cylinders which fit over the nipple and then use mechanical means to apply suction to the nipples.
Nipple pumps work like penis pumps in that they draw blood into the erectile tissue which arouses and creates pleasure. The suction is released by triggering a small release valve.
These pumps can be a great way to quickly get your partner’s nipples stimulated at the beginning of a play session. Many pump toys, such as Pumped, can also be used for clitoral stimulation.
You can use a sucking vibrator for nipple stimulation as well. These sucking vibrators are designed to use air pressure to “suck” on a clitoris.
Since clitoris and nipples are similar in shape and respond to similar stimulation clit and nipple toys are often interchangeable. Popular clitoral suction vibrators like the Lelo Sona Cruise 2 and Womanizer Liberty are excellent choices for clit and nipple play.
Get other body parts involved
Nipplegasms are like other types of orgasms in that they require a set of different body parts to be stimulated in order to reach climax.
Involving your partner’s neck, thighs, ears, bottom, and genitals can all be ways to increase overall stimulation and help them reach climax.
Creating pleasurable sensations across the body will greatly increase the chance of reaching a nipplegasm.
Try kissing a partner’s neck while pinching or flicking a nipple. Add a bit of sexy or dirty talk to your play session.
Stroke their inner thighs with one hand while having nipple suckers working on their chest.
If you or a partner enjoy anal play, add an anal plug. Using one of the vibrating butt plugs like the b-Vibe Trio Plug is a fantastic option.
This plug is controlled by a small remote. You can alter the anal sensation and the nipple sensation to make you or a partner increasingly aroused.
Vibrating cock rings, clitoral vibrators or G-spot vibrators toys can also be engaged to greatly increase arousal.
Add some kinky play
If you or a partner enjoys a bit of kink, there are many more ways to stimulate nipples! Crops, floggers, chains, Whartenberg wheels and much more can all be used to stimulate a person’s nips.
Impact play toys
Impact play is anything which involves hitting a body part. The breasts and nipples can be safely slapped and spanked. If you or a partner have larger breasts, try supporting the breast on the underside while you spank the upper breast and nipple.
Some people enjoy gentler forms of nipple impact.
Using a small floggers made with bunny fir or other soft materials to spank or tease a nipple will provide gentle impact stimulation. The combination of soft materials which can be drawn across the nipple or used to spank a breast.
For people who enjoy more intense nipple and breast stimulation, heavier and courser materials can be employed.
Floggers made of leather or vegan materials deliver a more substantial impact to the entire chest area.
If you desire intense, direct nipple stimulation, a riding crop works well. Use the small tip on the crop to slap the nipple.
Wartenberg Wheels, Vampire gloves, and other picky things
Prickly sensations on the breast, areola, and nipple can be intense and pleasurable.
Try Wartenberg pinwheel for a sharp, prickly sensation. Wartenberg wheels were originally medical tools to test nerve responses. They are a instrument with a handle and a rotating wheel with spikes on it. These have been adapted to kink play.
Gentle pressure produces a light pricking sensation which firm pressure feels more like drawing a knife across the skin. The original wheels were just single wheels.
However, for kink, they have evolved with increasing numbers of wheels.
Vampire gloves are leather gloves studded with small metal spikes. These spikes are rubbed across the skin, used for spanking, or pressed into skin to create a combination of pleasure and pain.
Using vampire gloves to scratch your chest and pinch nipples can be very arousing. Additionally, if you enjoy being scratched during sex, these gloves are a great addition to your toy chest.
Safety first
Chest and breast tissue will bruise after being slapped, flogged, or hit. If you or a partner bruises easily because of a medical condition, or if you want to avoid leaving marks, avoid hitting your partner with firm slaps, heavy floggers, canes, or paddles.
If you do bruise, using ice packs for 15 minutes three or four times a day and applying arnica cream will help reduce the size and duration of the bruise.
How do I know if I can nipplegasm?
If you have never had a nipplegasm, how do you know if you are a candidate for one? Its hard to say, since there isn’t a lot of research done on who does and does not experience a nipplegasm. However, there are some clues to look for.
If you already enjoy having your nipples and breasts stimulated, you are probably a good candidate.
Enjoying nipple play already means you are tied into the arousal connection between your nipples and the genital sensory cortex in the brain.
Nipplegasms happen more frequently for people who take their time during sex.
Nipplegasm will not occur with an afternoon quicky. If you and a partner regularly have a ten or fifteen minute encounter and then roll over and go to sleep, you are not investing enough time to create a nipplegasm.
People who engage in a variety of forms of stimulation during play are more likely to experience nipplegasm.
If you want to explore this type of orgasm, talk to your partner about extending the types of activities and time you spend having sex.
You are willing to try to stimulate yourself. It is easier to reach nipple orgasm if you are willing to practice stimulating your body. Take time when you masturbate to touch different parts of your body.
Explore using nipple clamps, nipple suckers, ice and other stimulation tools on yourself. As you get comfortable being touched with different toys and in different ways, you are training your body to erotically respond to nipple play.
This will increase your chance of nipple climaxes.
What if I have decreased sensations in my nipples?
Lots of people experience events which cause decreased sensation in their nipples. This can be from surgery, trauma to the area, aging, and some neurological disorders.
If you experience decreased sensation, this does not mean you are out of luck.
Try using nipple pumps, stronger nipple clamps, sucking vibrators, and impact to stimulate your nipples. While a gentle lick or touch may not do much, some of these more intense types of play might really work for you.
Gender dysphoria
Some people experience gender dysphoria when their breasts are played with. If you or a partner is nonbinary, trans, or genderfluid, breast and nipple play might be fraught.
Ask them (or tell them) about what works and what makes you (or them) uncomfortable.
For people who are genderfluid, find a way to communicate if you are open to nipple play or not before you start having sex.
Just because you or a partner is nonbinary/trans/genderfluid does not mean nipple play is out of bounds. Some people with these identities still really enjoy nipple and breast play. Sometimes just changing what you call a body part can help make you more comfortable during sex.
If you are a trans man and have not had top surgery, referring to your breasts as a chest or pecs may feel more appropriate. For trans women, referring to their chest as breasts or titties may help alleviate the dysphoria and open up nipple play.
Bottom line
The bottom line of all this is nipple play is amazing! Nipplegasm is a great benefit of intense nipple play. Like other orgasms, nipplegasm should not always be the end goal.
Sex is meant to be fun, to help two people connect, to release tension, and to provide pleasure. Discovering your nipples can make you climax is a wonderful experience.
However, if every time you have sex you focus intensely on nipplegasm it may end up feeling more like a chore than a pleasure. Relax and take your time. Have fun and connect with someone.
And if you climax, give a good shout for joy!
About the author
Rebecca Blanton, aka Auntie Vice, is a writer and kink educator. She holds a Ph.D. (abd) in Political Psychology and a BA in Psychology.
Their work focuses on gender, power, and kink//BDSM. She runs the award-winning blog LoveLettersToAUnicorn.com and has published several books, including The Big Workbook for Submissives, a finalist for the 2018 Golden Flogger Award. She has taught about kink and submission for the past seven years.
She regularly performs stand-up and storytelling. Prior to turning her attention to kink education and writing, she served as the Executive Director for the California Commission on the Status of Women and Girls and worked as a Senior Policy Analyst for the California Research Bureau.
