You asked:

I want to start exploring anal play but have no idea where to begin. Any tips or must-haves for a total beginner? Also... can I just use lotion as lube or is that a bad idea? Thanks.

Grace:

If you’re just getting into anal, the b-Vibe Anal Training Kit is an excellent starting point. It has everything you'll need to kick things off (except lube) and three high quality plugs, as well as educational materials to answer any questions you have. It is great value and just makes the whole thing way less intimidating.

And yeah... don’t use lotion. You’ll want a proper anal-safe lube like Sliquid Sassy. It’s thicker, longer-lasting, and made for exactly this. Your butt deserves better.

Frequently asked questions about anal play and training

I'm a total newbie - what's the very first thing I should do?

Start slow and relax: breathe, loosen your pelvic floor, and begin with external play (light massage around the anus) to get used to the sensation. Build arousal first - it makes relaxation and any later insertion much easier.

What basics should I have on hand?

Must-haves include a generous anal-safe lube (the article recommends Sliquid Sassy), a small tapered butt plug or an anal training kit (b‑Vibe Anal Training Kit is a popular starter), clean towels, and condoms for toy-sharing. Bonus items: a comfy pillow and mood lighting for comfort.

Can I just use lotion or body oil as lube?

No. Avoid lotions and random body oils-they can irritate, trap bacteria, or degrade toys. Use a dedicated anal-friendly lube (thicker, longer‑lasting formulas are best). If you have silicone toys, avoid silicone-based lubes with them; water-based anal formulas like Sliquid Sassy are safe and effective.

Do I need to douche or clean out first?

Not required. A gentle external wash is usually sufficient. Some people use a mild douche for confidence, but don't overdo enemas-they can irritate the rectum if used too often. If you choose to douche, use a soft nozzle and be gentle.

What size/type of toy should I start with?

Start small and tapered with a flared base-think "slim and short," not wide and long. Training kits with graduated sizes are great because they let you progress at your own pace. Always choose body-safe materials and a flared base for safety.

Ouch - it hurts. Now what?

Stop. Add more lube, breathe, and try again later or return to external stimulation. Pain is not something to push through-it's a sign to slow down or stop. If you're with a partner, communicate clearly and take breaks. Solo practice with fingers and gradual exploration helps build comfort and confidence.