As a submissive, I’ve endured my fair share of beatings, and a sound flogging is one of my fave ways to get a rosy red butt.
My Dom is a talented guy who knows how to swing his thing, so if you’re keen to learn how to use a flogger, read on. I’ll give you practical advice, step-by-step techniques, and creative scenarios to try.
How to choose the right flogger
Floggers consist of a handle (a long solid shaft you can grasp with your hand) with numerous tails (also known as falls or tresses) attached.
A flogging can be delivered for fun or punishment, with the Dominant partner swinging the flogger to strike the submissive.
Floggers come in various designs and colours, but don’t buy one based on appearance alone. Go for a quality product with the right qualities to meet your flogging needs.
Floggers can produce different sensations, stingy or thuddy, depending on the design and how the tool is used.
The handle should feel comfy to hold, and as a general rule, the more tails the flogger has, the heavier it will be.
Heavier floggers with wider tails strike targets well, as the tails travel through the air together, striking the flesh to provide a thuddy sensation.
If you're a beginner, the length of your tool is important, too.
Newbies should stick to shorter floggers as they are easier to use. More experienced players can go for something longer. Keep in mind, the longer the flogger, the trickier it is to use, and if the tails are too long, they will be prone to tangling.
As for the material of your flogger, quality leather is the way to go.
Some leathers, such as suede from cows and pigs, feel supple and soft, and oil tanned leathers from elk and deer also feel soft to the touch. Top grain leather is thicker, less pliable, and feels coarser.
Before we move on, here’s a quick rundown of some of the different types of floggers available.
Beginners should stick to balanced floggers as they have long handles and are easy to control.
If you’re a little more confident in flogging, you can look at a knotted or braided flogger which are great for delivering a stinging session.
Advanced players have a buffet of floggers to choose from, including martinet (multi-stranded leather tool), a cat o’nine tails with its knotted tails and swivel handle floggers, which allow plentiful movement for intense impact.
Safe zones and where you should hit
Before you engage in a flogging session or any other BDSM act, you’ll need to gain consent.
Negotiation is an essential part of any kinky scene and should never be overlooked. Discuss what you would like to get from play, talk about your boundaries and limits, and identify safe words/signals that can be used to slow and cease play.
Before you get your flogger out and start striking, you’ll need to know where you can and can’t hit and talk about marks on the skin. If your partner wants to remain unblemished, deliver a flogging that won’t bruise.
While your sub might be keen to experience pain, you don’t want to cause serious injury through a shoddy approach to play.
Read: Erotic spanking: How to properly spank your partner?
In the words of my Dom, if you’re unsure, stick to soft and squashy bits. Good areas for flogging include the chest, thighs, arms, and bouncy buttocks.
Stay well away from the sensitive hot spots, as you could cause damage, and a trip to the Emergency Room isn’t the way to end any scene. The lower back is a no-go as one of your vital organs, the kidney, lives here.
The stomach should also be avoided as it’s a bit risky to start flogging that sensitive area. Steer clear of the joints, neck, and head, too.
Your partner should disclose any medical issues in advance – if they have problem areas, don’t go remotely near those areas with your flogger.
How to practice using a flogger
Don’t go straight for the skin; if you’re new to the world of flogging, it’s a good idea to practise first. Grab a pillow and find a spacious area to swing your arm back and forth to hit your target.
As your swing and aim improve, you should hit your pillow target more confidently and convincingly.
Use varying pressure and pace to get a feel for your tool before you take it to your partner’s body. Talk to your partner about the sensations, e.g. sting or thuddy, that they would like to experience.
When you both feel ready, you can try out real-life flogging.
Needles to stay, always start slowly and increase the speed and force to apply more intense impact. Stand close when you begin to maintain control and keep a close eye on your sub. As your ability grows, you can stand further away, providing more space to swing your implement, resulting in a firmer flogging.
Flogging techniques for beginners
If you’re new to flogging, keep the session relatively short and strike the sub lightly. It’s normal for the flogger to sting, and you might notice the area you are striking turn a shade of pink or red.
Mastering the basic swing
Keep it simple and get to grips with the basic swing. Easy techniques include figure of eight and overhand & underhand flogging.
Stand behind your partner and bring the flogger down or up in one sweeping movement. Striking your partner like this results in a thuddy impact with the full length of the tails hitting the skin.
Controlling force and precision
Use your wrist to power and control your flogger rather than your arm.
Get the wrist action right, and you can deliver a flogging your partner won’t forget in a hurry. Always hold the shaft of the flogger further down (toward the part where the shaft meets the tails) to maintain control.
Finding the right rhythm
Light hits are always encouraged at the start of the session.
Take your time between each strike to find your target and deliver. Once you’ve got into your stride, you can keep the flogger moving by circling your wrist, play some music if it helps, and flog to the beat!
Flogging techniques for experienced players
When you’ve got basic flogging under your belt you can move on to more advanced sessions. My partner and I play in this way, and a sound flogging always makes me wet.
Florentine flogging
Florentine flogging involves using two floggers simultaneously to strike the skin. It’s a difficult technique to master, and you’ll need to work at it.
The method involves using both wrists in a figure-eight type motion. Your right wrist should come up and over with the tails striking the skin, and as that flogger pulls back slightly, the left wrist comes up and over with the tails striking the skin. You’ll need rhythm for this, and if you can, find a mentor to teach you.
Targeting erogenous zones
You can focus your efforts on certain areas such as the thighs, and buttocks to ramp up play.
Swing and strike (moving closer to your sub and then further away to increase and decrease the intensity). You can also flick the end of the flogger against the skin for a stingy precision hit. Varying the force and speed will keep the session fresh and heighten sensations.
Combining flogging with other forms of play
Flogging doesn’t have to be a stand-alone form of play.
Bondage restraints and impact are a match made in heaven, and I love being secured over a spanking bench before being flogged. With my wrists and ankles cuffed to the bench, I feel helpless and exposed, and as the flogger comes down, I can’t help but squeal with delight.
Read: How to use sex restraints: list, how-to, scenarios
Flogging scenarios for BDSM play
Many BDSM scenarios naturally lend themselves to the enjoyment of flogging. Here are three to get your teeth into, but I’m sure you’ll come up with a few of your own.
Dominant/submissive roleplay scenarios
Roleplay scenes such as prisoner and guard, teacher and student, boss and employee can all be used in conjunction with flogging. Get into character with costumes and props and set the scene.
Flogging for punishment and reward
Punish a naughty sub by securing them to a St. Andrew’s Cross for a flogging. Talk about the punishment in advance to build anticipation and make sure they count the strokes as you deliver each.
When you’re through, the sub should thank you and then stand in the corner to reflect upon their bad behavior. A flogging can be given as a reward as well as a punishment; in this case, you could make the sub beg for it, and then they can give you oral after to thank you for your kind attention.
Flogging as a way to enhance power play
Flogging makes for perfect punishment and funishment, but if you share a D/s dynamic and indulge in power play, you can use flogging to assert control.
A maintenance flogging can be useful to keep things on an even keel, and flogging your sub at a kink event (in front of fellow fet friends) can be a thrilling experience.
Flogging for pleasure and pain
Some things complement each other perfectly, such as coffee & cream, Batman & Robin, and pleasure & pain.
Floggers deliver on the pain front, and now that you know how to use one, you’ll be flogging like there’s no tomorrow.
I hope you’ll find as much pleasure indulging in impact play as my partner and I have.